It’s springtime, so you know what that means, right? It’s time for summer blockbuster trailers.

I’ve got a couple of the big summer movie trailers below, plus an actual spring release. Madness I tell ya. The big movie this weekend is BATMAN V SUPERMAN: DAWN OF JUSTICE. I wonder who will win. Probably Wonder Woman. I’m super curious to see what trailers they show before BATMAN V SUPERMAN starts. If you see it this weekend, let me know what trailers you saw in the comments.

In the meantime, let’s review some movie trailers.

BEN-HUR (August 12)

Remember GLADIATOR? This remake of BEN-HUR sure does. This trailer is guilty of one of the worst sins: It shows you everything, explains every plot point, and shows what I’m sure are the best shots from the chariot race. Of course, if you’ve seen the original Charleston Heston-starring BEN-HUR then you’ve already know everything about this movie, too. Grade: C

THE LEGEND OF TARZAN (July 1)

Here’s another trailer that looks like it might be showing you every plot point, but I think THE LEGEND OF TARZAN looks kinda exciting. I’m not just talking about a shirtless Alexander Skarsgård, either. Plus, it’s got Christoph Waltz doing his Christoph Waltz thing. I’m leery of seeing movies that feature animals in prominent roles, even CGI animals, because I’m a sensitive flower that cries every time an animal is hurt or killed. FYI, I also can’t stomach babies or children being in danger, harmed or killed – it’s not just animals. I’m not a monster. Anyway, back to THE LEGEND OF TARZAN … Grade: B

THE JUNGLE BOOK (April 15)

THE LEGEND OF TARZAN and THE JUNGLE BOOK: Children being raised in the jungle by animals is so hot right now. This live action JUNGLE BOOK looks… umm, fine. This trailer isn’t a “bear necessity.” Get it? It doesn’t make me want to see this movie. It makes me want to see the 1967 animated  film. Grade: C

MISS PEREGRINE’S HOME FOR PECULIAR CHILDREN (September 30)

Hey, you guys, Tim Burton is directing a movie that’s not a remake, re-imagining or reboot. Pretty exciting, right?! Back in the day, the name Tim Burton meant we were in for something really special, but after craptacular “re-imaginings” of ALICE IN WONDERLAND, CHARLIE AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY, PLANET OF THE APES, DARK SHADOWS, I would groan when I saw his name on a trailer. MISS PEREGRINE’S HOME FOR PECULIAR CHILDREN looks, well, kinda good. Also, Eva Green is the new Helena Bonham Carter. We all know that, right? Grade: B

SAUSAGE PARTY (August 12)

Because who doesn’t want to watch a movie in which food have thoughts and feelings? Let’s pretend the movie is actually funny. It could happen. What’s the message? Is there supposed to be a message? I really wanted to like this trailer. I’m a big fan of SUPERBAD. And I want to see a rated R animated movie just as much as the next person. Sadly, this trailer left me hungry for more laughs. See what I did there? I guess the joke is if food had thoughts and feelings it wouldn’t want to be eaten. Well, we have that in the real world, too, and they’re called animals. I look forward to reading your angry comments. Grade: D

Sonia Mansfield is a writer/mocker/old movie watcher/beer drinker/goober. Make sure you follow her on Twitter for constant updates or check out her blog, The Sonia Show.

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Article: Trailer Park: BEN-HUR, TARZAN, JUNGLE BOOK And More

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